xoxo: Happy birthday?

1 February 2009

Happy birthday?

Thanks for my friends for celebrating my birthday.
Usually for all my birthday I'll be super excited and happy , not 1st feb 2009.
sigh , I really hate myself.

one word disappointment. I was doing for the sake of myself. I'm trying very hard to be happy only, thats all. Why am i doing this?

Can someone just be real to me , tell me what must I do? I hate myself .
fucked up birthday. goodbye

* Really , I'm not emo-ing.
This is how I feel
Sad
I want CRY
angry
I'm stupid
Hope that I don't even exist
Disppointing
Cos everyone is disppointed with me

by myself

I've learnt that the people you love most are going to be the ones who hurt you the worst, but you're going to have to learn to forgive them for that, simply because you love them. I've learnt trust, and the vulnerability of it; how it takes years to build, but only takes suspicion to break. I've learnt that the most cliche saying ever, "never judge a book by its cover", might just be the most true. I've learnt that no matter how bad your problems are, there's always someone out there having it worse. I've learnt that good doesn't always triumph in the end. I've learnt that sometimes forgiving yourself might be the hardest to do. I've learnt never to give up on the future, no matter how bleak it may seem, because whatever negative thing's happening to you now will pass in time. I've learnt never to set your goal too early in life, because sometimes it doesn't help but instead prevents you from trying out other things.I've learnt that home is always the best, and that family will always stand by you, even though you might not have talked to them for a long time. I've learnt that sometimes the best company is your own. I've learnt that passion is never enough to get what you want; talent counts for more than anyone thinks. I've learnt that sometimes the things we hold onto aren't really what we want to keep; it's just that we're afraid of letting go of the familiar. I've learnt that to let go doesn't necessarily mean to forgive and forget; it simply means to accept.And finally, I've learnt that if you want to love others, you must first learn to love yourself.

1 February 2009

Happy birthday?

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